Let's Talk Leadership

Aw, leadership. The thing everyone thinks they know how to do and yet few actually do. Let me start this post by saying that, in a sense, I am the leader of my children. And I fail drastically most days. So I'm not claiming to be an expert and I'm not saying I know everything. And I'm not saying I'm this high powered CEO who leads a company to success and glory. I just know that I have observed some things that absolutely do not work. And by process of elimination, have some ideas of what might. Think about it. How many college or Sunday School classes have we all sat in where the question is asked: "What makes a good leader?" What responses are always put out there?

• Trustworthy
• Motivating
• Humble
• Exemplary
• Peacemaker
• Understanding
• Compassionate
• A good listener/friend

I think these mostly hit it on the head. Now let me say that there are two different types of seemingly effective leaders. The kind that implements the above traits and the ones that are exactly the opposite. Follow me here. There's always the leader who works through selfishness, greed, big-headedness, micromanaging, and pride. These leaders get results as well. Their team members, employees, or associates are afraid of them, in a way. They're loose cannons. No one knows when they will lash out, go back on their word, lay down unnecessary rulings, etc. So they work to please this leader because they feel they have no other choice. Not because they want to. Not because they feel loyalty toward that person or because they admire them. But because they have to. So yes, results are had. But morale is low and loyalty is nil. 

On the other hand, there are those leaders to lead as the Savior did. By example. Through kindness and love. Having expectations but willing to gently and appropriately teach and forgive whilst upholding those expectations. The team members, employees, and associates of these leaders are motivated. They feel needed and competent. Positive reinforcement (yes, adults need that too) is a force for good. Those team members enjoy and want to please their employer, teacher, leader, etc. 

To me, a leader is someone who:

• is not only trustworthy but trusts those under them. 
• helps team members feel needed and capable. 
• allows team members to do things their own way so long as it is building the company or organization. They are open to ideas and are willing to give credit to those who come up with those ideas. They are willing to admit they are wrong or that someone else's way may be better. They are humble. 
• exemplifies the values of the company or organization.  
• doesn't talk behind other's backs. They build team members both to their face and behind their backs.
• corrects their team members privately and appropriately, being willing to hear all sides of a story. 
• helps out. They don't sit on the sidelines and micromanage. They get their hand dirty. They make sure they understand the stresses and tasks involved for those they manage. 
• respects who you are as a person and understands the many roles you play in your life (family, work, church, etc).

That's the leader I want to please. That's the leader I want to follow, the one I feel loyal toward. Not the one I have to. But the one I want to. 

I pray every day that I can be that leader for my kids. That I can be the woman they want to be like. The one they want to please and the one they love and respect and feel loyal towards. I'm so grateful to have had leaders like this to watch and learn from. And I'm also a little (though slightly less) grateful for those leaders I've observed who aren't like this. After all, trials are great teachers :)